A relationship expert says women should “date at least three men at once” and abstain from sex – so they don’t get “attached” before assessing who is right for them.
Kayleigh Castle, 35, is a dating and life coach who has spent the past three years sharing her top tips with women – to help them avoid the mistake of a “chemical rush for a relationship”.
When it comes to dating, Kayleigh insists people are “too quick” to rush into a relationship or become exclusive.
She claims women should date at least three men at a time – adding that dating does not equal sex and women should refrain from intimacy during the dating phase.
Kayleigh compares dating to buying a house and says “you have to look at the property a few times and check the foundations before you jump into bed.”
Kayleigh, from Huddersfield, West Yorkshire, said: “As soon as I say ‘date’ people think I mean sex.”
“People think I’m telling women to sleep with whoever they want, but dating is an assessment.
“The reason I tell women to date at least three men at the same time is that women fall more chemically than men and bond.
“We confuse this chemical rush with a bond.
“We need time—if you’re dating multiple men at once, you’re not giving your time to one person.”
Kayleigh says her advice is nothing new, and older generations met a lot of people at once to make a connection.
She said: “It’s our history as women, it goes back to our grandparents.
“My grandmother is in her 90s – at the time the date was dating, they would meet a lot of men to see which man was suitable.
“They realized it took time to get to know someone.”
Kayleigh suggests that if singles are dating several men at the same time, the ‘weaker’ men will eliminate themselves over time.
She also advocates no physical contact, adding that men will stay for two reasons – if they have a relationship and have sex.
Kayleigh said: “You’re getting to know these men, take your time getting to know them because the weakest link will always eliminate itself over time.”
“The only men who stick around is if they really like you and you’re in a relationship or if you’re having sex with them.”
“That’s why I say people shouldn’t have sex when they’re dating.
“There’s this expectation where people think they have access to my body.”
Kayleigh says people are “very quick” to become exclusive, which comes down to “need”.
She claims that dating is like buying a house and people don’t rush the process when buying a house.
Kayleigh said: “When we buy a house, we go into the house, maybe look at it a few times and check that everything works.
“A surveyor goes around, we don’t rush the process – we take our time.
“So we think other people are watching the house? Yes, they are, but do we sleep in the bed, no no.
“We are checking the foundation investment and we are checking that it is a suitable house.
“I say to women, time is your best friend.”
Kayleigh’s Dating Timeline –
0-3 months: getting to know each other
3-6 months: treat him as a friend – the foundation of a healthy relationship is friendship
6-9 months: then it’s like ‘OK, this can be something more’
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